- The other day i was at work, sitting at my desk and blankly staring at the blank monitor, waiting for something brilliant to happen... unfortunately, nothing brilliant did happen... and that was when i decided that i had had enough with life... and decided to... download some jokes (and not kill myself! duh!)... just to make me feel better...20 jokes later, i went back to Google and searched for "funny jokes"...
- Ok... i'm taking a wild guess that 90% of you didn't get what i meant there... heh!... kinda reminds me of those Reader's Digest jokes... they have an entire page dedicated just for jokes... and none of them are funny... sometimes it gets real hard to even figure out what they meant!
- This is for drunkards... ever wondered how, when you are absolutely senselessly drunk, you have managed to switch off the light, and then, after fifteen minutes of sleep, you realize that you want to puke... and then... wonders of wonders... you can't find the light's switch... and you can't find your way to the loo in the dark either... and then there are a whole lot of possible consequences... 1. some smart people crawl all over the floor, and finally find their way to the loo... 2. you scramble all over the wall, and finally end up standing against the wall and sleeping off... 3. you quit trying and simply puke in the room itself... all over the walls, floor and the bed...
- After having watched four of his shows, i still can't figure out why people still continue watching the Russell Peters shows... it makes no sense... a third of the audience around the world who watch his videos are (i'm guessing) Indians... and he calls all Indians "Cheeky Stinkin' Bastards"... a third of his live audiences around the world are (again i'm taking a guess) Blacks... and he calls all Blacks "Black Motherf*****s"... duh!
- My close observations have led me to conclude that the most misspelt word in South India (i don't know about North India because i've never been to North India) would have to "Gobi Manchurian"... following are the common variants found here...
- Gobi Manjurien
- Kopi Menchurien
- Gopi Manchoorian
- Kobe Minchorian
- Kobi Manjoorian
- Oh!... i was in Pondicherry recently... and i happened to visit this place called Auroville... supposedly, this place symbolises peace and tranquillity... but then... the height of irony... the place was designed by an architect named Roger Anger!!...
- It's kinda hard to believe, but the name 'Gaylord' has been picking up pretty fast here... you see Gaylord Travels, Gaylord Garments, Gaylord Restaurant, Gaylord Time House... don't these people see what the name implies??... or are they trying to prove a point?????...
- I've always felt girls, no matter how hot and popular they are, who call each other 'babe', 'darling', 'gurl', 'sweety' etc. amongst their little 'girl gangs' go right on top of my loser ratings... jeezzz!!!.... they just have no lives!!!... pathetic!
- I was at a pretty famous church in Kerala a month ago... the kinda place where everything is quiet, and you see old females sitting here and there, murmuring prayers to themselves... and then... this Swedish couple enter the church (Swedish because i couldn't understand a word they were saying to each other... not that i would have understood if they were talking in French or Slovakian... but i prefer to stick with Swedish)... and they go right under the Crucifix and stare at it like they were seeing one for the first time... and then... the female draws out a camera and clicks a pic with the guy posing under the Crucifix... she even clicked a pic of the signboard under the Crucifix that read, in bold letters, "PHOTOGRAPHY STRICTLY PROHIBITED"... they went around the entire church clicking pictures... during her photography spree, she passed my mom who was sitting at the other end of the church... my mom, who normally scorns at all injustices in society, managed to greet the female with a faint smile... think about it... an Indian couple entering a church in Europe and clicking pics... for sure there would be someone who'd come up, throw the camera out and say "Get ouda here!... Now!!!"... Indians... sheeesh!!!...
- Ever wondered why it is "Good heavens no!" and "Hell yeah!"....???
- In any part of India, when there is a very big crowd outside a particular shop, it simply means that there is a television in that shop which is telecasting a live cricket match played by the Indian team... however... in Kerala, if you see a very huge crowd outside a particular shop, it simply means that the shop is a liquor store...
- I have never understood the point in holding these cross-city marathons for world peace, or for the world's heart patients, or AIDS patients and crap like that... do they think Bin Laden's gonna see the marathon and think "Oh crap... i shud never have taken down the WTC... i give up terrorism... i quit!"...????
