Sunday, August 15, 2010

Freedom-di-di-dumb

Gabbar used to be a resident of Unfree Village... now, the specialty of Unfree Village was that job opportunities was zilch... so every man was a thief... small boys were trained to become professional thieves when they grew up... getting caught and going to prison was part of the job nature...

And Gabbar got caught too... he was placed in a tiny prison cell - barely enough place for a bed, a table and a commode... but life was kinda good... the food was excellent - he didn't have to steal to earn it... however, two years later, the prison management changed hands... the new management wanted to give the inmates more 'freedom'... so they shifted all of them to new cells... these cells were much bigger than the previous ones... but, there was no bed, no commode, and no good food... the inmates had to sleep on the floor, they could shit and piss anywhere they liked in the cell, and the only food they got was the remains of what the prison officials had eaten...

And the new management called this 'freedom'... some people liked it because they were allowed to do whatever they liked as long as they remained in their cells, while others despised it because life had become a ball of crap, and the new management was simply terrible at management...

This... is independence in India... Happy Independence Day to all fellow Indians!!...

What are we really independent from??!!... God alone knows... at least if the Brits were still here, we would have had more Pizza Huts, McDonalds' and KFC's everywhere!!... and we would have had Brit gurls in college!... that way we wouldn't have to put up with the attitudes of the plain-looking local girls!!...

Anyways, that reminds me, i was at Chicking yesterday... yes... i keep going back to these places inspite of them having fooled me a zillion times... i guess i simply have no other choice!!... i was going through the menu, and suddenly i came across this offer... yeah... yet another offer!!!... this time it was called the 'NRI Fest'... i didn't really get the whole idea behind the thing... there's this regular chicken bucket that costs around 400 bucks normally... in the 'NRI Fest' package, all they did was throw in a box of fries and a PET Coke, with the chicken bucket, and lo!... it's 750 bucks!!!... either they think NRI's are dumb (which seems like the more likelier case), or they think all NRI's own Cadillacs, and three-storeyed houses with jacuzzis and a separate room for the home theatre, and a couple of poodles!!...

Phew... Onam's just a week away!!... (wooo!... time's surely passing real fast... i still remember last year's sadhya)... sometimes i wonder whether Mahabalipuram was named after Mahabali... hmmm... nahhhh.... that couldn't be... the tamils would never be so generous enough to name a whole place after a non-tamil... that too, a MALLU!!!!!!!!... oh these tamils!... they surely do have the knack of making a mallu feel out of place... sigh... the woes of a mallu should-have-been-engineer-but-became-writer-thanks-to-a-wicked-twist-of-destiny...

Speaking of 'should-have-been-an-engineer', there was this time when the TV at home began making weird noises at the back, but the picture was just fine... my mom kept pestering me to check what was wrong... i asked her to wait till the picture went out... the pestering grew even more pestering, till i finally got up to check what was wrong... but at the back of the TV, there was this sign that read "This cover should be removed by experienced professionals only"... since i wasn't experienced or professional, i went back to my seat... my mom got utterly butterly pissed off and screamed, "What kind of an engineer are you? Simply wasting 4 years!"... come to think about it, why this injustice only towards engineers??... by the time we complete 4 years of engineering, we're supposed to know how to repair a television, a car, the local substation, a space craft, a time machine, and a satellite flying in space!... why is it that people don't ask a medical grad to perform a heart surgery or a liver transplant at home???... why only us?????...

(Ok, i guess i'm getting addicted to Facebook as well... almost every second post in this blog has something about Facebook!) There's this recent annoying habit few of my friends have gotten into... they blog about some crap (called 'Notes' in FB lingo) and then they go about tagging each and every one in their friends list to the blog... and then, idiots like me go through the entire crap, hoping to find our names mentioned somewhere in the blog... very clever!... that's made all the idiots in their friends list go through the entire nonsense they've written... wish these 'clever' people would use their brains for the development of the country!!... now that it's independence day...

I can't wait for BSNL to launch their 3G and 4G services... as Deepika Padukone says, i'm expecting it to improve my life and make it more exciting!!... ah... life's really gonna turn exciting when i turn 30... i've promised four friends that i'll be going on an all-India roadtrip with them (individually!) as soon as i turn 30... haha!!... should be fun... as long as the world doesn't end by 2012!!!...

PS: i hate the fact that Blogger doesn't have the autocorrect feature...

ciao!

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